Minding the P’s & Q’s of SNL

QUALITY: For a Hilary Clinton cold open, and it’s sketches like this that really sells how much more the staff are Clinton fans then any other candidate, this had shades of originality and meta-weirdness (oh Jeb) that have been so great this season, and held promise for the episode going forward.

PROBLEMATIC: How quickly I realized that McCarthy had only hosted four times, thus confusing me riiight out of the joke, can only be blamed on the SNL Fantasy League. AND I DO IT FOR YOU!

QUALITY: Seriously, “Formation”. It’s black as fuck and it don’t care. Oh, also that’s one of the best sketches of the season thanks to a mix of over-reacting and disappointed confusion. Kenan confirming that Beyonce was white in the Pink Panther movie, may have been my favorite part?

PROBLEMATIC: Post-Update is when the show lost a step for me, unfortunately. The Art of the Pick-Up artist could have gone a number of interesting ways, for example, but seemed content on being a showcase for an overly aggressive Melissa McCarthy character. Once McCarthy was choking out Pete Davidson with his own shirt in the Cul-De-Sac Test Screening sketch, their was NOTHING she was going to do to top it!

QUALITY: Leslie Jones! Matthew Smith of the Ignorant Sluts will not agree, but damn it all… Jones’ Weekend Update monologue was her best yet! It proved an amazing collection of qualities she wanted in a man, “Smokes weed. Has a mother that doesn’t want to hang out with me… unless she smokes weed.” I’m not even someone who smokes (sorry Leslie) but just the execution of this particular joke was amazing. How was Jones ever not going to be a performer on SNL, again?
QUALITY: Deep Thoughts on SNL has a NEW(ish) HOST, Brian Edwards of prior Deep Thoughts guest spots and the SNL Fantasy League team The Team You Wish You Hadn’t Started A Conversation With At A Party! Enjoy our Deep Thoughts on SNL podcast! Subscribe, listen, enjoy! Deep Thoughts, when they can, also tweets during the show, so join in on twitter!

Kate McKinnon, 67 points

• 7 points - cold open
• 5 points - reoccurring (Hilary Clinton)
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 10 points - "LIVE FROM NEW YORK...!"
• 10 points - monologue
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 3 points - 10 to 1 sketch (Whiskers R We)
• 5 points - reoccurring (Barbra D'Grue)
• 5 points - host hug

Kenan Thompson, 53 points

• 10 points - monologue
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 7 points - Weekend Update
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Himself

Vanessa Bayer, 50 points

• 5 points - promo
• 7 points - cold open
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 7 points - Weekend Update
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Herself

Cecily Strong, 44 points

• 7 points - cold open
• 10 points - monologue
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 5 points - caused break (Leslie Jones)

Beck Bennett, 41 points

• 7 points - cold open
• 5 points - reoccurring (Jeb Bush)
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - sketch (Franklin Station Transfer)

Taran Killam, 37 points

• 5 points - promo
• 7 points - cold open
• 10 points - monologue
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 5 points - sketch (Franklin Station Transfer)

Kyle Mooney, 36 points

• 7 points - cold open
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Freestyle Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Himself
• 5 points - rapping/dancing

Bobby Moynihan, 36 points

• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (Family Movie Night)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Himself

Sasheer Zamata, 27 points

• 10 points - monologue
• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)

Aidy Bryant, 21 points

• 7 points - cold open
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)

Jay Pharoah, 12 points

• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)

Leslie Jones, 42 points

• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Day Beyonce Turned Black)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 2 points - swearing ("b*tch")
• 7 points - Weekend Update
• 5 points - as Herself
• 6 points - swearing ("ass" x2, "little b*tch")
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• minus 2 points - breaking
• 5 points - sketch (Franklin Station Transfer)

Pete Davidson, 29 points

• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 5 points - sketch (Family Movie Night)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Himself

Jon Rudnitsky, 24 points

• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 7 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - as Himself

Melissa McCarthy, 59 points

• 5 points - singing/dancing
• 10 points - pre-taped sketch (The Cul-De-Sac Test Screening)
• 2 points - swearing ("f*uuuuuuuuuuuuuck")
• 5 points - sketch (Family Movie Night)
• 5 points - sketch (The Art of the Pick-Up)
• 5 points - kiss
• 5 points - caused break (Leslie Jones)
• 5 points - sketch (Franklin Station Transfer)
• 5 points - sketch (Whiskers R We)
• 2 points - swearing ("ass")
• 10 points - embraces cast first

Kanye West, 15 points

• 10 points - pre-taped sketch (Mooney Rap Battles Kanye)
• 5 points - rapping

THE TEAM YOU WISH YOU HADN'T STARTED A CONVERSATION WITH AT A PARTY - Brian

Kate McKinnon - 67

Leslie Jones - 42

Jon Rudnitsky - 24

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Pretentious Crap & 2) I'm a Giant Douche

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 192

WAR HORSE CAN DANCE - Megan M.

Cecily Strong - 44

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Beck Bennett - 41

Kanye West - 15

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) No More Parties in L.A.

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 141

BILLION DOLLAR MURRAYS - Russel

Kate McKinnon - 67

Aidy Bryant - 21

Beck Bennett - 41

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) Low Lights

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 134

MARK WAHLBERG ATE MARK WAHLBERG - Sarah R.

Cecily Strong - 44

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Vanessa Bayer - 50

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Waves

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 130

THE FUTURE MRS. RANDY GOLDMAN - Leah

Kenan Thompson - 53

Kyle Mooney - 36

Jon Rudnitsky - 24

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) No More Parties in L.A. & 2) 30 Hours

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 113

THE IGNORANT SLUTS - Matt

Kenan Thompson - 53

Jay Pharoah - 12

Kyle Mooney - 36

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) Feedback

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 106

DESOLATE ISLE - Rob M.

Taran Killam - 37

Aidy Bryant - 21

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Real Friends

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 100

THE NOT READY FOR FIRST PLACE PLAYERS - Kevin M.

Taran Killam - 37

Jay Pharoah - 12

Vanessa Bayer - 50

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) No More Parties in L.A. & 2) 30 Hours

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 99

PHIL HARTMAN TROPHY STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. Desolate Isle - 1706
2. The Not Ready for First Place Players - 1669
3. War Horse Can Dance - 1627
4. Billion Dollar Murrays - 1559
5. Mark Wahlberg Ate Mark Wahlberg – 1517
6. The Team You Wish You Hadn’t Started A Conversation With At A Party - 1429
7. The Ignorant Sluts – 1403
8. The Future Mrs. Randy Goldman – 1253

THE DARK, CLENCHED HOLE OF EVIL - Robb

Taran Killam - 37

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Cecily Strong - 44

Sasheer Zamata - 27

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) Ultra Light Beams

5 points - first song

10 points - second song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 218

THREE-LEGGED JEANS - Lori

Kenan Thompson - 53

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Leslie Jones - 42

Pete Davidson - 29

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Waves

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 160

MY DOLL'S NAME IS JENNY - Douglas

Kate McKinnon - 67

Kyle Mooney - 36

Jay Pharoah - 12

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) No More Parties in L.A.

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 157

SKANKY LITTLE PROSTITUTES - Mike

Kate McKinnon - 67

Cecily Strong - 44

Jay Pharoah - 12

Pete Davidson - 29

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) 30 Hours

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 157

KEBERT XELA - Christopher

Kenan Thompson - 53

Aidy Bryant - 21

Beck Bennett - 41

Kyle Mooney - 36

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 151

LIL BABY AIDY - Will

Aidy Bryant - 21

Taran Killam - 37

Beck Bennett - 41

Vanessa Bayer - 50

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Famous & 30 Hours

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 149

GILDED RADNER STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. Lil Baby Aidy - 2172
2. Skanky Little Prostitutes - 2132
3. The Dark, Clenched Hole of Evil - 2070
4. My Doll’s Name Is Jenny - 1908
5. Kebert Xela – 1741
6. Three-Legged Jeans – 1721

NOT A STRONG SWIMMER - Krissy

Cecily Strong - 44

Kenan Thompson - 53

Vanessa Bayer - 50

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) 30 Hours

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 152

THE VONDRUKES - Samantha B.

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Jay Pharoah - 12

Leslie Jones - 42

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 149

DAN AKROYD RAGE - Mark

Kate McKinnon - 67

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Aidy Bryant - 21

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Waves & 2) All Day

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 124

ANTHONY'S JOE PESCI SHOWMANSHIP - Anthony

Pete Davidson - 29

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Beck Bennett - 41

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Famous & 2) Highlights

2 points - song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 122

ORGANIC WIFI - Andrew K.

Kate McKinnon - 67

Jay Pharoah - 12

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Famous

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 121

SPOOKY BEHAVIOR - Emily

Cecily Strong - 44

Beck Bennett - 41

Kyle Mooney - 36

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 121

SUCK IT TREBEK - Sarah C.

Taran Killam - 37

Kenan Thompson - 53

Aidy Bryant - 21

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 111

COLIN JOST'S GHOSTS - Colm

Taran Killam -37

Kyle Mooney - 36

Jon Rudnitsky - 24

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) No More Parties in L.A.

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 102

WAYNE’S WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. Organic Wifi - 1825
2. Suck It Trebek - 1646
3. Dan Akroyd Rage - 1602
4. Not A Strong Swimmer - 1574
5. The Vondrukes – 1372
6. Colin Jost’s Ghost – 1336
7. Spooky Behavior - 1282
8. Anthony’s Joe Pesci Showmanship – 1241

MISS SWAN'S LOWERED EXPECTATIONS - Patrick

Cecily Strong - 44

Kenan Thompson - 53

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Kyle Mooney - 36

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) 30 Hours

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 247

MURRY'D WITH CHILDREN - Johnny

Kate McKinnon - 67

Cecily Strong - 44

Beck Bennett - 41

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 194

DRUNCLE - Mick

Kate McKinnon - 67

Kenan Thompson - 53

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Sasheer Zamata - 27

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 183

EFFIE VILLALOPOLUS' PROFESSIONAL COMPLAINERS - David S.

Taran Killam - 37

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Pete Davidson - 29

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Ultra Light Beams & 2) Highlights

2 points - song

2 points - song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 156

THIS TEAM HAS EVERYTHING - Sarah S.

Beck Bennett - 41

Kyle Mooney - 36

Aidy Bryant - 21

Jay Pharoah - 12

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Facts

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 110

BILL BRASKY'S DRINKING BUDDIES - Saad

Taran Killam - 37

Aidy Bryant  - 21

Jay Pharoah - 12

Sasheer Zamata - 27

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2)???

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 102

FARLEY GROUP STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. Murry’d With Children - 2073
2. Effie Villalopolus’ Professional Complainers – 2072
3. Miss Swan’s Lowered Expectations – 2065
4. Druncle – 1980
5. Bill Brasky’s Drinking Buddies – 1728
6. This Team Has Everything – 1569

TOTAL BASTARD AIRLINES - Andrew R.

Kate McKinnon - 67

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Kyle Mooney - 36

Sasheer Zamata - 27

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) 30 Hours

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 230

COLOMBIAN DECAFFEINATED COFFEE CRYSTALS - Dylan

Kate McKinnon - 67

Beck Bennett - 41

Cecily Strong - 44

Pete Davidson - 29

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 181

HARRY CARAY'S BBQ MOON RIBS - Ian

Kenan Thompson - 53

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Aidy Bryant - 21

Pete Davidson - 29

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) No More Parties in L.A. & 2) Real Friends

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 153

THE NIGHT CRAWLERZ - Kevin K.

Taran Killam - 37

Cecily Strong - 44

Kenan Thompson - 53

Jay Pharoah - 12

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Real Friends & 2) Father Stretch My Hands pt. 1 & 2

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 146

NUNI AND THE HAIR CHAIR - Megan R.M.

Aidy Bryant - 21

Taran Killam - 37

Leslie Jones - 42

Beck Bennett - 41

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) 30 Hours

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 146

CRISIS OF CONFORMITY - David W.

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Jay Pharoah - 12

Kyle Mooney - 36

Vanessa Bayer - 50

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - NO SONGS CHOSEN

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 134

BELUSHI GROUP STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. The Night Crawlerz - 2354
2. Nuni and the Hair Chair - 1999
3. Columbian Decaffeinated Coffee Crystals - 1984
4. Total Bastard Airlines - 1892
5. Harry Cary’s BBQ Moon Ribs – 1780
6. Crisis of Conformity – 1627

INTERNATIONAL NASTY GIRL$ - Abby

Kate McKinnon - 67

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Aidy Bryant - 21

Sasheer Zamata - 27

Melissa McCarthy - 59

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Famous

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 224

LAZY SUNFEYS - Meg

Kenan Thompson - 53

Cecily Strong - 44

Beck Bennett - 41

Kyle Mooney - 36

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Ultra Light Beams & 2) Famous

2 points - song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 176

HADERS TO THE LEFT - Samantha L.

Kate McKinnon - 67

Taran Killam - 37

Pete Davidson - 29

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) 30 Hours & 2) Famous

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 175

HEATHER FROM WORK - Lauren

Cecily Strong - 44

Taran Killam - 37

Beck Bennett - 41

Kyle Mooney - 36

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Famous & 2) 30 Hours

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 158

THE WEEKENDERS - Justin

Kenan Thompson - 53

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Vanessa Bayer - 50

Jay Pharoah - 12

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Highlights & 2) Waves

5 points - first song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 156

BOYFRIENDS TALK SHOW - Andrew E.

Jay Pharoah - 12

Bobby Moynihan - 36

Aidy Bryant - 21

Leslie Jones - 42

MUSICAL GUEST - Kanye West - SONGS: 1) Real Friends & 2) Ultra Light Beams

10 points - second song

EPISODE THIRTEEN TOTAL 121

POEHLER GROUP STANDINGS (after Episode 41x13)

1. Haders to the Left – 2171
2. Heather From Work - 2038
3. Lazy Sunfeys - 2010
4. International Nasty Girl$ - 1956
5. The Weekenders - 1931
6. Boyfriends Talk Show – 1710

Jonah Hill will the Host of Saturday Night Live, on March 5^th! Enjoy a couple of weeks off before we gain a running start on the last stretch of the season! It is Jonah Hill’s fourth time hosting. He was only selected by ONE team in the entire League… The Vondrukes! This makes it the second episode in a row that The Vondrukes has gained a Host pick, so big congrats to them! Future will be the Musical Guest!

Hill is a surprise host, as he only has the Coen’s Hail, Caesar to promote! Still, as long as we let him know that this is his fourth time hosting, he won’t be looking for early entry into the Five Timers Club! These things SHANT be rushed!

The first time Leo wrestled with a bear... wait, no, Jonah is more of a cub.

Russel Harder hosts Trivia Club at Hitch (1216 Queen St East) every other MONDAY, at Lou Dawg's near Ryerson (76 Gerrard St E) every TUESDAY, and Cardinal Rule (5 Roncesvalles Ave) every WEDNESDAY!